There are several aspects, components, definitions, forms, and outcomes relating to Domestic Violence. Here in this post- let's focus on targeting and bringing down the #1 perpetrator of domestic violence- ourselves.

I do consulting and coaching for victims, perpetrators, and survivors of the societal definition of domestic violence. I have experience with people of all ages, backgrounds, prevention advocates,and lived through it personally as probably most of you have in some shape or form. I've gone to workshops, trainings with law enforcement agencies, studied the stagering statistics, and have come to see that it (Domestic Violence) is Everywhere! From certain perspectives... there doesn't seem to be any end to this crisis!

The damages of domestic violence are typically seen after the fact. The perpetrator sometimes gets caught, jailed and then released from jail to repeat the cycle. This is very discouraging, depressing and sad. There's got to be a way to end the vicious cycle- Right?!

I think it will begin to end when we stop committing Domestic Violence in our own home. I mean in/to our own bodies, minds and against ourselves. This might not be a popular angle to the topic, but I truly believe that ending violence against ourselves is one area where we can make a difference.

The idea that we are violent towards ourselves may seem ridiculous to you, but think about it-

  • do you ever mentally beat yourself?
  • do you ever put yourself down and insult yourself?
  • do you ever scare yourself with what if's?
  • do you ever neglect the need to urinate?
  • do you ever eat to much that your stomach hurts?
  • do you control your tongue when you really need to express yourself?

These are true examples of ways in which we are abusive in "our house"- our "temples". Why do we do this? How can we stop? The answer to this dilemma is different for everyone- but I know looking at our own behavior and working towards making amends to ourselves is a good place to start and will bring society closer to ending the vicious cycle.

It's one way to help put a dent in the number of 'victims' who suffer from maltreatment. Additionally, we can do our part by setting an example for others by treating ourselves well and not abusing "a loved one".