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What will it take to inspire full, uncompromising commitment to improving your situation? Will you need to lose key relationships? Will it take a bankruptcy? Will you need to physically and mentally “burn out” from stress? At the root of these and most other reasons for making a decision to change is fear.

Whether it’s fear of being alone, fear of suffering the negative effects of poverty, fear of becoming terminally ill, or fear of business failure, fear (in its many forms) is a powerful motivator. However, it’s been my experience that attempts to change that are motivated by fear fail in due time.

The problem with changes driven by fear is that you need to live in a constant state of fear to stick with your plan and maintain the changes. Living in a long-term, constant state of fear is paralyzing to your mental and spiritual outlook and ultimately leads to physical exhaustion. Once the fear or the perceived threat is diminished (for example, you realize that you won’t live in poverty even if you’re not wealthy), the resolve to remain fully committed to the new changes diminishes also.

I believe it is far better to be driven to change by self-love and self-respect. Love and respect can be just as powerful as fear when it comes to directing behavior. The difference, however, is profound when the long-term effects are compared. Fear produces a stress effect that damages and exhausts the body, mind and spirit. Love and respect heals and builds the body, mind and spirit. Another difference is that the things we do when we are fearful are not usually things we want to do. And, most important, we don’t feel good about ourselves after we’ve done them. Behavior and choices based on love and respect are usually the opposite. We usually want to do the things we do and we feel really good about ourselves after we’ve done them. This even applies to those seemingly unpleasant tasks.

Some extraordinary positive things happen when self-love and self-respect drive change:


  1. You recognize that your life is a gift and that your precious gift of life deserves every opportunity to fulfill its potential, personally and professionally.
  2. You recognize that it is your responsibility to nurture your gift of life in the highest and best way.
  3. You recognize a need to love yourself enough to be conscious about your choices.
  4. You recognize the need to respect yourself by not sabotaging your opportunities with unsupportive choices.
  5. You make a choice to allow in your life only those things and relationships that honor your life’s purpose.
  6. You recognize that to love and respect yourself in these ways may require fundamental changes in some of your beliefs and the establishment of supportive habits … and you’re eager to do it.

Although this discussion has been in the context of personal change, it applies equally to business change. A fatal flaw in most business strategic planning efforts is overlooking that business change fundamentally begins with and is sustained by individual personal change. After all, it is individuals that run the business.

Wherever you or your organization are in the change process, I encourage you to explore and acknowledge your driving forces for change. Take proactive steps to develop supportive strategies. Get objective help if needed to ensure your driving forces and your plans are sustainable.

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